Tag Archives: Lexi

We’re All Adopted: Overcoming the Stigma

I came across this reflection on the stigma surrounding adoption. It’s pretty heart-breaking. The writer, an adoptee herself and an adoptive mother, talks to kids about adoption a lot.

Here’s what 10-year-old “Sam” said when she asked him what he thought it meant to be adopted:

“Well, being adopted is when the kids that nobody wants are put into an orphanage and then if the kid is really good, someone rich will pick them and buy them to have in their family.”

Ouch.

She writes about five themes that continually come up about adopted children:

  1. Adopted children are unwanted.
  2. Adopted children can become more desirable when they exhibit good behavior, i.e. being the perfect child.
  3. Adopted children are thought of as a commodity; they are a good that is exchanged in a transaction typically received by someone considered rich or well-to-do.
  4. Adopted children are disposable; their permanence in their adoptive family is always conditional.
  5. Adopted children deserve pity, because they are the kids who no one wants.

That’s even more heart-breaking. Help me in overcoming, shattering and in any way possible breaking these myths about adopted children. Kids (and all of us) need to hear the truth.

Continue reading We’re All Adopted: Overcoming the Stigma

Lexi Does Johnny Cash: Devil’s Right Hand

One of my favorite Johnny Cash songs is “Devil’s Right Hand.” It’s on a playlist I created of half Lexi’s music and half my music (I can only stand so much Veggie Tales). I guess we’ve been playing that list a little too much lately, because now “Devil’s Right Hand” appears to be one of Lexi’s favorites.

Abby alluded to it yesterday and now here’s a bit of the original followed by Lexi’s rendition:

You can snag a copy of “Devil’s Right Hand.” It’s included in the Unearthed box set:

iTunes: Single / Box set

Amazon: Digital Single / Digital Box set / CD box set

Family Photo Shoot

Hendricks Family Photo ShootWay back in June we did a family photo shoot with Barbara O’Brien at her White Robin Farm in Wisconsin. It was a beautiful drive out there (I think I missed a turn and took a longer, more scenic detour) and we had a lot of fun doing a relaxed, non-studio family photo shoot. And I finally got around to posting the pictures: Check ’em out.

When we pulled up and got out of the car Lexi was all excited about the few cats milling about the yard. Then Barbara started calling the cats and they just started pouring out of the barn. She has at least 25 cats, and most of them came when she started calling.

In addition to the cats, Lexi chased the chickens, fed the horses and held a baby duck (she also manhandled the kittens and baby chicks). We got to run around, have some fun and the whole time Barbara took lots of pictures.

We highly recommend it.

Lexi in Times Square

So yesterday we went on an impromptu trip to New York City.

We took Lexi to the Hershey store. A store of chocolate. She wanted a rubber ball.

We took Lexi to the M&M store. An entire wall covered with pick-your-color M&Ms. She wanted an 8 oz. pack of M&Ms that you can get in every gas station, convenience store and mini-mart across the country.

My kid is weird. I love it.

(And today she threw up because all she had for supper was a pack of M&Ms and a chocolate shake from Jamba Juice. We suck as parents.)

Enjoying the Como Park Lily Pond

Last week I stopped off at Como Park with Milo for a quick walk. I spent most of my time at the Lily Pond, a place that has neither a pond nor lilies. It’s just a 100-year-old empty concrete pond with an old concrete and stone bridge. It’s kind of forgotten among Como Park’s other attractions. I think I enjoy it so much because it has that abandoned feel and hints at something older that’s been lost as the surrounding park has changed around it. I feel history at that bridge in a way I don’t at other old places.

A while back I hung out at the Lily Pond with Lexi, so it seemed appropriate to do it with Milo this time around.

Lexi on the Bridge
July 23, 2007

Kevin & Milo @ the Lily Pond
June 2, 2009

Appreciate Where You Live

Lexi & Pinky on the TrailI’ve talked before about my soft spot for Detroit, but this Chicago Reader article about cool things to do in Detroit actually makes me want to visit the Motor City. It probably helps that I also have a soft spot for funky art and abandonded/decaying places (i.e., urban prairie and decrepit buildings, though I’ve only ever done urban exploring vicariously).

A visit to Detroit is do-able but unlikely, but the article did make me think more about my current locale and what kind of things here in the Twin Cities would be worth a vacation to check out. That’s kind of a weird concept, imaging where you live as a vacation spot. I usually think of vacation spots as places you have to drive cross country to get to and normal people don’t actually live there. I mean if you lived in a vacation spot, where would you go on vacation?

But weird questions aside, what’s so cool about the Twin Cities?

Continue reading Appreciate Where You Live

Surviving the First Week

Abby went back to work on Monday and we’ve now survived our first week back to “normal.”

In some ways it was great. I actually managed to accomplish some things. I kept up with the minimal amount of work I have right now (and actually had a few leads come in for more work). I even managed to do a little cleaning and reorganizing (with two kids I think we’re always going to be reorganizing something).

In some ways it was not so great. Like when Lexi peed on the bathroom rug while I was giving Milo a bath (if that wasn’t enough, the washing machine then ate the rug—I think it’s time to put the rug out of its misery). Or when Abby was late getting home from school and Milo had been screaming on and off for an hour and wouldn’t take a nap and Lexi started screaming and then Speak had a seizure (Speak’s OK, he’s had them before and there’s not much we can do about it—consequences of a small, pet store dog). Those moments were less than fun.

I keep trying to tell myself that I don’t have to actually accomplish anything during the day (keeping the kids alive and fed is an accomplishment in and of itself), but that doesn’t jive with my responsibility-driven nature. I also keep trying to summon patience I don’t naturally have. With a wailing 6-month-old and a 3-year-old who refuses to listen, I need a deep well of patience.

But overall we did manage to survive. So that’s good.

Back to “Normal”

Tomorrow Abby heads back to work and I get to tackle a 3-year-old and a 6-month-old on my own. It’s a return to normal, if you can call that normal. I’m not really ready for being double-teamed, but I guess you never are. Sometimes I wonder how parents manage to stay home with multiple kids, but I guess people do it all the time. I never understand how single parents do it.

Fortunately there are only about five weeks left of school and then Abby’s off for the summer. It’s an early summer vacation this year, and for that we’re thankful.

All this handling of children seems so natural and easy, like a normal rhythm of life that just happens. At least it seems that way until you actually do it and realize there’s nothing easy about it.

There’s a great temptation to just do what’s easy with children. To take the path of least resistance. I’m great at giving in to that temptation.

What? You don’t want to wear pants? Meh, whatever—we’re not leaving the house.

What? You want to watch Sesame Street every day? OK.

What? You’re throwing a fit? Just go to your room because I don’t want to deal with you.

Continue reading Back to “Normal”

Taking Milo to the Doctor

Today we dropped Lexi off at a friend’s house and took Milo to the University of Minnesota’s Pediatric Clinic to see a Specialist in International Adoption. That means we took him to his first doctor in the U.S.

We left the parking garage and walked through the long underground tunnel (which inexplicably comes out on the second floor), eventually arriving at the Pediatric Clinic. We avoided getting lost in the campus’ labyrinth, which reminded me why I went to a small school (though ironically, I don’t think I ever consciously decided I wanted to attend a small school).

The high point was perhaps handing over a yogurt container to the receptionist that contained a sample of Milo’s poop. I believe it was blueberry (the yogurt container, that is). We had to collect a stool sample at home and bring it in. It’s kind of like show and tell, but not really. It wasn’t just plopped into the old yogurt container either, it was inside a Ziplock bag. But let’s just say those things aren’t exactly as air-tight as advertised. That yogurt container gave off a distinct odor when I pulled it out of the bag and set it on the counter. And it wasn’t residual blueberry.

Anyway, we eventually had our appointment and several doctors and specialists told us how beautiful Milo is. Not just handsome—beautiful. Despite my lack of any sports-related skills, Milo will at least be raised confident enough in his manhood to be called beautiful.

Continue reading Taking Milo to the Doctor

Home from Ethiopia

Lexi & MiloIt’s hard to believe a few days ago I was in Africa. We made it home Friday afternoon with Milo and Lexi thoroughly embraced her big sister role.

A lot has happened and there’s a lot to say, but for now we’re doing OK. The plane ride home went surprisingly well (yay for the bulkhead!) and Lexi did great while we were gone. But by Saturday reality started to set in as Abby got sick while Milo spit up an entire bottle on me and Lexi threw a fit. The night and morning were a bit rough but by Sunday night I think we’re starting to get a handle on things. I hope.

We’ll have a lot more to say about everything, but that’s a basic update. It’s good to have the four of us in the same place.

Oh, and photos are starting to go up on Flickr (there’ll be many, many more).