A Class Reunion of Sorts

I had a weird dream last night. I was visiting my high school (Yes, I have reoccurring dreams about school—you’d think at 31 these dreams would go away, but no. A few weeks back I dreamed about having to go to school with Yeshumnesh!) and while stopping by the room of a former teacher (who suddenly had a ginormous office complete with fire place) half of my graduating class showed up. It was some kind of bizarro reunion, but I was seeing all these people I hadn’t seen since high school (and I couldn’t remember half their names). Unlike most of my high school dreams this one wasn’t traumatizing—it was hopeful and uplifting.

Which is all very fitting because that’s pretty much what happened yesterday (not the bizarro reunion part, let me explain).

Julia Music is an old friend from middle school and high school. We were really just classmates back then, but today I consider her a friend as we’ve bonded over adoption and long waits. She’s been a big supporter of my book, Addition by Adoption, and even got an unnamed mention on page 50. She heard about the slow but steady pace of my effort to build a clean water well in Ethiopia through charity: water. A portion of the proceeds from my book go to the well and a lot of folks have donated above and beyond that. Since April we had raised $2,046 of the needed $5,000, which is pretty remarkable.

Well, Julia stepped in and decided to help me get to halfway in one day. That meant raising $454 in one day. She started bugging people on Facebook and didn’t stop. She posted well over 150 times on people’s Facebook walls, asking them to donate to my cause. Some people call that annoying. I call it life-changing. Because the money started coming in.

It was $10 and $20 at a time (and sometimes a little more) and it started adding up. Since launching the book and this campaign in April I’ve had 10 people make donations directly to my charity: water campaign. Yesterday 21 people donated. Many of them were people I went to high school with.

By midnight a total of $475 came in, putting the campaign at $2,521—just over halfway.

We’ve been so busy lately—busy with our second Ethiopian adoption—that I’ve hardly had time to think about promoting my book or continuing to beat the drum for clean water in Ethiopia. $5,000 was beginning to feel like it would take forever. And then someone else comes in and carries the load for a little while.

As Mark Horvath of InvisiblePeople.tv would say, I’m just wrecked. I’m humbled that my former classmates would rally like this. I’m full of gratitude and overwhelming thanks. “Thank you” hardly begins to cover it.

A class reunion indeed.

Only $2,479 to go until we can build a clean water well in Ethiopia.

Book Sales By the Numbers

Sometimes it’s easy to get discouraged when you’ve published a book. We’re not all Seth Godin. Books don’t fly off the virtual shelves. So I thought it might help to take a look at the numbers and try to keep them in perspective.

Addition by Adoption officially released on May 11 with a pre-sale in April. A few numbers to date:

  • Copies sold: 185
  • Copies in circulation: 212 (we’ve handed out 27 freebies for publicity, promotion and to friends/family)
  • Total donated to charity: water from book sales: $568
  • Total donated to charity: water by others: $1,478
  • Total raised for charity: water: $2,046
  • Number of people receiving clean water so far: 102
  • Amount we still need to raise to build a well in Ethiopia: $2,954

That’s all pretty incredible. Namely that a self-published book by an author with no platform (love my Twitter friends, but 1,600 followers is not a platform) could sell 185 copies. Even more incredible is that folks have pitched in nearly $1,500 to help build this well in Ethiopia with charity: water. That’s awesome.

What’s a little less awesome is that my net-profit is currently negative. People have told me that writing books is not a good way to make money, and I’m seeing how true that is. Though in all fairness, part of that negative profit is due to unsold inventory from an event that wasn’t very successful. If I can sell that unsold inventory I’ll be back in black (want a multi-copy pack or an Awesome Edition?).

Yes, I’ve become the self-published author with a box of unsold books in the basement.

Though they’re not in a box in the basement, they’re sitting on a shelf in my office. And now I’m thinking a shelf full of my own books in my office is a little narcissistic.

Then again, it’s a Twitter book. Maybe that fits.

So 185 books and $2,046 for clean water in Ethiopia! Those are good numbers. Thank you.

Promotion or Obscurity

I’m struggling right now with how hard to promote my book, Addition by Adoption. Or at least I would be if I weren’t so busy. With another adoption (an 11-year-old, no less!), another book project and the end of summer, I’m not sure my life has reached this level of busy before. So the book kind of gets forgotten.

And that’s the struggle. Do I let it slide into obscurity or do I work even harder to promote it, keep it on the forefront of people’s thoughts and sell a few more copies? Or is it already in obscurity and I should just give up now? Or is all that promotion just annoying?

I worked relentlessly in April and May to promote this book and get it out there and the response was pretty incredible. The sales for a self-published book were spectacular. Of course spectacular sales of a self-published book don’t account for much.  When I look at my expenses the book hasn’t even broken even yet (let’s not even talk about the time involved). And we still need to raise $3,000 to build that well in Ethiopia.

Publishing is a harsh mistress.

Of course for all that promotion there are still people who have no idea I published a book, let alone a ground-breaking book of tweets. Nevermind a book exploring adoption. There are still people who said they’d do some kind of promotion and never did. There are still people who said they’d buy a copy and never did. Sometimes people need to be reminded again and again and again. And sometimes that just gets old.

So I guess we’ll see what happens. This post serves as a handy (and lame) bit of further promotion. So don’t forget that we still have ‘Awesome Editions’ of the book available ($12 goes to charity: water!) and you can always buy it on Amazon.

“I’m Not Anti-Muslim. I Just Don’t Like Muslims.”

So this whole “ground zero mosque” story is kind of incredible. It just keeps going. Makes me very weary of election years. No wonder nobody votes. I especially love how both sites throw out the ol’ “Anyone with common sense can see that,” argument. As weary as I am of talking politics, the way we talk about this issue keeps getting more interesting.

The other day I came across this blog post about a Washington Post article about Islamic critics, including blogger Pamela Geller. The short version is that folks like Geller are really mad that the Washington Post called them anti-Muslim. Incredulous, the blog post exclaimed, quoting some examples. It starts with Geller defending herself:

“I am not anti-Muslim. This is a slanderous lie. I love people. All people.”

But then Geller has also said:

“It’s the Muslims who are dragging the rest of the world with them, in their genocidal dreams of annihilating goodness, creativity, production, inventiveness, benevolence, charity, medicine, technology, and all of the gifts of the Jews.”

From a quick and dirty look at her site, it seems Geller likes to find examples of Muslim extremists and then blame all Muslims for their actions. The second quote above was about Arab youths attacking Jews in Germany, a shameful and despicable crime for sure, but not one my moderate Muslim neighbors are guilty of, no more than I’m guilty of picketing the funerals of U.S. soldiers because Christian extremists have done that.

Robert Spencer, another writer who resists the “anti-Muslim” label has also written:

“I have written on numerous occasions that there is no distinction in the American Muslim community between peaceful Muslims and jihadists.”

So he’s saying all Muslims are terrorists. Including, I’d guess, these Muslims in Minnesota who are teaming up with the Methodists to pack food for earthquake victims in Haiti. And somehow that whitewashing of an entire religion of 1.6 billion people isn’t anti-Muslim?

As bizarre as all of that is, I’m interested in something else.

What Message Are We Sending?
What Geller, Spencer and the like are effectively saying is “I love all people, but I don’t like what these particular people are doing.” It’s fine to say that, but when you make that statement about an entire group of people, you’re going to be labeled as anti-“those people”.

I can’t help but wonder if that sounds anything like the evangelical Christian response to homosexuality? It’s the old “hate the sin, love the sinner” axiom. It’s Christians saying “We love gay people, but they can’t have the same civil rights everyone else has.”

I’d guess Geller’s insistence that she loves all people sounds just as absurd as Christians who insist they love homosexuals while campaigning to undermine their rights.

A recent article from Relevant Magazine explores the next generation’s approach to gay marriage. It’s characterized by a lack of political fervor, a yearning for real conversation and plain old tolerance. I imagine that lack of rhetoric is what we need in the debate surrounding Muslims.

It’d be nice if in this debate we could find that tolerance and appropriately separate the extremists from the moderate Muslims. Let’s condemn extremist actions but celebrate religious freedom for the moderates.

And if you really want to revel in the Islamiphobia, you can check out Loonwatch.

Seth Godin Gives Up On Traditional Publishing

Marketing guru Seth Godin is giving up on traditional publishing, according to a teaser to an upcoming interview. We’ll let Godin explain it himself:

“I’ve decided not to publish any more books in the traditional way. 12 for 12 and I’m done. I like the people, but I can’t abide the long wait, the filters, the big push at launch, the nudging to get people to go to a store they don’t usually visit to buy something they don’t usually buy, to get them to pay for an idea in a form that’s hard to spread … I really don’t think the process is worth the effort that it now takes to make it work. I can reach 10 or 50 times as many people electronically. No, it’s not ‘better’, but it’s different. So while I’m not sure what format my writing will take, I’m not planning on it being the 1907 version of hardcover publishing any longer.”

On one hand I think this is kind of funny. Poor Seth Godin, it’s so much work to sell those books. There aren’t that many authors who have an easier time selling books than Seth Godin. He could publish a book of blank pages and it’d top the business best seller list.

On the other hand, I see where he’s coming from. One year from author’s brain to bookstore shelf would be considered lightning fast in the publishing industry. The emphasis on making a big splash can be pretty overwhelming. And if you can spread your ideas in other formats (assuming spreading your ideas is all you’re after), why not go for it?

The reality here is that Godin can do whatever he wants. He can sell hardcover 1907 books if he wants, and he could just as easily sell digital 2010 books. If speed is his concern he could write up a manuscript and have it on Kindle in mere days. He could even have a hardcopy version available on Amazon in about a week. It’s not hard (I’ve done it).

What is Social Media Good For? Ask Johnny

If you’re one of those people who doesn’t get the blogging or the Twitface and always scratches your head wondering what this stuff is good for, well, just ask Johnny. I talked about him the other day: Johnny is a disabled veteran who has been living in his mobile home until it got impounded. His very home was impounded and he had to live on the streets in his wheelchair for 19 days.

Thanks to Mark Horvath of InvisiblePeople.tv spreading the word through social media, he was able to raise an additional $345 to go with the $280 Johnny had raised on his own and get his home out of the impound.

Here’s the story:

Helping the homeless doesn’t have to be so hard.

If you’re in the Twin Cities, there’s a local ‘sleep in your car’ event organized by a guy who sleeps in his car. It’s an opportunity to experience what the homeless experience every day and get motivated to do something about it.

Raggedy Edge, Women Vote! & Homeless Vet’s Home Impounded

“So here is us, on the raggedy edge. Don’t push me and I won’t push you.”

I think that quote from the beginning of Serenity sums up my life nicely right about now. Too bad I’m feeling pushed.

Moving on to better things.

Go Women
Today is the 90th anniversary of the 19th Amendment, which gave women the right to vote. It’s hard to believe that before 1920 women couldn’t vote in this country.

Go Mark
And my friend Mark Horvath is traveling the country again, telling the stories of the homeless. Today he told us about Johnny (or is it Jimmy? Update: It’s Johnny), a disabled veteran who needs $350 to get his mobile home out of the impound. You can help by making a donation. Here’s the full story on what happened to Johnny.

Update: Johnny got his home back. Thanks!

(And wow, that felt like a disjointed blog post from 2004.)

American Mosques

I don’t like blogging about politics. I did a bit too much of it in the last presidential election and it left a bad taste in my mouth. People tend not to disagree well and it gets ugly. When you mix religion and politics it gets even uglier. But sometimes I feel compelled to talk about. Being quiet and looking the other way doesn’t help anyone, so we need to speak up.

How sad is it that I hesitate to post this because of our complete inability to have ideological differences? This is what extremism accomplishes.

I’m talking about the current controversy over the proposed Islamic cultural center near Ground Zero in New York City. You can already see the ideological sides lining up based on the language I used. I didn’t call it a mosque and intentionally noted that it’s “near” Ground Zero (two blocks away, in fact), and not “at” Ground Zero. (Now would that language be considered journalistically unbiased because it’s factual, or completely biased because it’s the language one side of the debate prefers?)

Personally, I don’t think an Islamic presence near Ground Zero is big deal. And a whole lot of folks have argued it better than I could, from Christians and Jews, to these couple defenses, to New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, to one of the women behind the project, to the Daily Show’s Jon Stewart.

In a nutshell, I think freedom of religion reigns. That’s what makes America great. If people want to argue that it’s too close and too painful and all the rest, I get that, but I respectfully disagree. There’s a difference between religious extremists who turn to terrorism and a worldwide religion of 1.6 billion people. Let’s not forget that non-terrorist Muslims died on 9/11.

And I think that’s where the problem begins. Some people don’t see a difference, and they see all Muslims as terrorists, or at least purveyors of a great evil. That’s why mosques across the country have been protested, including Temecula, Calif., Sheboygan, Wis.Murfreesboro, Tenn., and New Haven, Ct.

And if that’s the rationale—that freedom of religion doesn’t apply because Islam is evil—I don’t understand why these arguments are just coming up now. And perhaps those making these claims would say they’ve argued for this all along, but it just now seems to be catching on. If mosques truly are “jihadist recruitment centers,” isn’t that something for the FBI to sort out? (and it sounds like they’ve done that).

In the end, if someone truly believes that Islam is evil then there’s not much of a discussion to be had. And that’s perhaps why I hesitate to write this post—if any potential commenters believe that, then we’re not going to get very far. At the very least, let’s be up front about that (because too often we spend lots of time arguing before realizing our views are fundamentally divergent and we should just disagree and move on).

I find it depressing when Christians paint all Muslims with the same brush. Christian complain (loudly) when that happens to us, whether it’s the Crusades, the Inquisition or Westboro Baptist Church. And just as critics point to the Koran as proof of Islam’s ills, anyone can point to the Bible for all kinds of out-of-context horrors, be it perpetuating slavery or silencing women. Nevermind the flagrant accusations that Muslims are trying to spread their beliefs, claim political power or receive over-seas funding for new mosques. When Christians start using these arguments against Muslims, we don’t quite realize that atheists (or whoever) could employ the very same arguments against us (we forget how wacky our lingo sounds to those don’t agree with us).

It’s enough to work you up to a frenzy.

Which is why I love stories like this:

A small group of protesters took over a patch of grass across from the Islamic Center of Temecula Valley on Friday for a vocal but relatively tame protest against a proposed mosque, though they were greatly outnumbered by supporters from area churches who were there to support the Islamic Center. (LA Times)

How To Win/Lose a Customer for Life

I’ve had some trouble getting auto service lately. Let’s compare experiences and see who you’d rather go with:

My last visit to Tires Plus:
I sat in the waiting room for three hours while they changed my oil, didn’t bother to rotate my tires because they were so worn out (apparently from not being rotated often enough) and tried to sell me on $1,200 worth of repairs. When I finally asked if my car was done, they were surprised. The car had been done for a while. They called my house and when my wife told them I was sitting in their waiting room, they disagreed with her and said I stepped out. They never checked the waiting room, where I had been sitting for three hours.

Apparently they forgot about me and gave up. While paying the bill the sales guy made a big show of walking around the counter to shake my hand. I’ve never wanted to punch somebody so badly.

Today’s visit to Pace’s Service Center:
When I left Tires Plus I vowed never to go back. I asked around and decided on the little family-owned service shop that will still pump your gas for you: Pace’s Service Center in West St. Paul. I checked out their website and a friend vouched for them.

I went in this morning and sat in one of their three chairs in the “waiting room.” They had no wifi. No TV. No coffee. But they did have a steady stream of customers who seemed to know them by name. A couple people dropped cars off with vague problems and concerns they wanted checked out before they headed out of town. No problem. The guy who drove my car into the service bay was the owner. It was like stepping into a local garage from 50 years ago, complete with an old school “City Gide” map on the wall.

An hour later my car was ready and I was impressed. I shook hands with Jim, the service manager, after we chatted about a shared interest in web design.

“We want to earn one customer at a time,” Jim said, and I assured him that he had one more.

Then I walked out to my car. It seemed clean inside. Too clean. I looked back and the leafy bits from the “tree” Lexi insisted on taking into the car were gone. The window seemed extra clear and the mirrors were real shiny. I got out of the car and went back in.

“Did you guys vacuum my car?” I asked. Jim nodded. Vacuuming the interior and washing the windows is standard practice.

“You guys rock,” I said, shaking his hand one more time.

You can take a guess where I’ll be taking my car from now on.

A Family of Five One Week On

Yeshumnesh has been home a little more than a weekWaiting for Yeshumnesh at the Airport and we’re all slowly adjusting.

It’s kind of a rollercoaster ride to suddenly be the dad of a preteen. This morning I took Yeshumnesh to get her ears pierced. We’ve borrowed a truckload of Hannah Montana from the library. Her birthday list is filled with sparkly pink items. And I think I have the awkward, dorky dad part down. At least that comes naturally.

We’ve been trying to keep busy as boredom is definitely a problem. I hate that anyone could ever be bored—there’s way too much to do in life to be bored. Growing up one my friend’s parents treated ‘bored’ like a swear word and they’d put you to work if they heard you complaining about being bored. I kind of like that. But in this case it’s understandable as Yeshumnesh is still adjusting to everything and we can’t exactly kick her out the back door and tell her to go find something to do. Abby and I are doing a lot of remembering what it was like to be home for the summer and having nothing to do.

One night we went to the Mall of America as a family. The verdict was it was too loud and overwhelming. But McDonald’s ice cream was a win. We went to church on Sunday, but that was also overwhelming. I think having all kinds of strangers come up and talk to you is a little much for anyone. The board game Sorry has been a big hit. And as dorky as we may be as parents, the movie Josie & The Pussycats was deemed cool, so I think we get some kind of points for that.

On Tuesday night we went to a wading pool to meet with another adoptive family with three kids who were from the same care center as Yeshumnesh. They all knew each other in Ethiopia and it was quite a reunion. I saw them coming and pointed them out to Yeshumnesh. She jumped up and both girls ran to each other. There was hugging, squealing and a lot of talking in Amharic. It was so cool to see. I literally applauded (see: dork).

So we’re all slowly getting used to a family of five. The car feels crammed when we all pile in to go somewhere. The house is a lot louder (though that’s all Lexi and Milo). Meals have had to be a lot more organized—somehow one more person means we need to put more effort into it. And I think Abby and I are definitely going to bed earlier. Once Yeshumnesh goes to bed I usually look at the clock and balk at staying up later.

It’s only been a week and it’s still summer, so things will likely get bumpier later, but so far so good.