Today Has Conspired Against Me

Or maybe this entire week has conspired against me. Let’s count the ways…
(In case you can’t tell, this is one of those whiny, poor me posts, so feel free to move on now)

  • I’ve been sick since Wednesday night with a sore throat and persistent cough. Last night I was coughing so hard my chest hurt.
  • Because of all that I couldn’t go to the Social Media Breakfast on Friday morning.
  • I also couldn’t go to a planning meeting for a group of local church communicators I’m helping to organize.
  • That sickness also meant the date night my wife and I have been trying to have for two months that almost happened this weekend didn’t happen.
  • It also means I forgot about the U2 tickets that sold out in two hours on Saturday morning.
  • It also means I never had a chance to enjoy one last taco at Dora’s (OK, it would have been more like six last tacos).
  • This morning I left the kids with a babysitter and took the bus to the doctor. I missed the bus.
  • Which meant I missed my appointment by 20 minutes and the doctor wouldn’t see me.
  • Then I spent three hours at the dealership while they investigated my car’s uneven tread wear problem, only to tell me they have no answers.
  • Then I got a call from the babysitter that Lexi has been throwing up.
  • I dropped $50 at Best Buy tonight to replace items that have been lost or stolen in the last six months.
  • One of those items was a power cord for the portable DVD player Lexi watches in the car. Thanks to disposable electronics, that portable DVD player will now be the main DVD player powering our living room TV. (Our house has two VCRs and four DVD players, and only two of the DVD players work. And one is portable.)
  • We have two couches in our house. Lexi managed to throw up on both of them.
  • While preparing all the puke-stained items for the wash, I realized the dog peed on the carpet.
  • At this point it was supper time and I realized I never had lunch.
  • Being gone all day meant I got next to nothing done for work.
  • We were planning to go to Kansas for Thanksgiving and I was excited about introducing Milo to lots of extended family that hasn’t had the chance to meet him yet. Tonight we decided we can’t go to Kansas with all the sickness and our complete lack of preparation.

Did I forget anything?

However, this week is Thanksgiving. So let’s find some bright spots, shall we?

  • I’m wearing pants that don’t have penguins on them for the first time since Wednesday. I’m also showered, shaved and reasonably clean-smelling, so that’s a plus.
  • I finished about a thousand pages of sci-fi reading in the last few days. I know you’re supposed to watch TV when you’re sick, but I read.
  • Not buying U2 tickets could easily save us $200. Besides, the show’s already on YouTube, right? Plus we can always change our mind and find tickets on Craigslist.
  • The bus lines in my city are somehow aligned so it’s a non-stop ride from my house to my wife’s work. Makes the whole one-car family thing a lot more manageable.
  • While missing the bus meant I missed my doctor’s appointment, I’m actually feeling better.
  • Skipping the appointment I don’t seem to need will save me $150. Score.
  • I’ve been able to call in a flexible and reliable babysitter who was willing to be picked up at 6:30 a.m. (but ultimately wasn’t, thanks to said illness) and also dealt with puking child with calm and ease.
  • Someone else had to deal with my kid puking while I sat in a dealership and watched the Simpsons Movie.
  • While the dealer didn’t have much help for my tread wear issues, it turns out my badly worn tires should last the winter and that’s one bill I don’t have to swallow right now.
  • The timing of the whole dealership issue meant I had time to hit Best Buy, Target for sick food and pick up my wife from work so she didn’t have to take the bus home. That meant the wife was home faster and I could offer the super babysitter a ride home. Time saved for everybody.
  • On that trip to Best Buy I replaced the lost/stolen items with better items. Yay for upgrades.
  • Of those two, puke-stained couches, one is from Ikea, which means every bit of soiled fabric on it is machine-washable. Score. (That other couch? Yeah, part of it is washable, so that’s good. But let’s face it—that couch is ten years old and will need to be burned someday soon.)
  • Not having lunch meant my leftover Subway was still in the fridge, untouched. Easy supper for me!
  • When I did sit down to work I found out I had scored a large project, in spite of my insistence for a larger budget and more time. The events of this week were making this project seem more and more impossible, but my demands (pleas) were met and suddenly the project is very do-able.
  • Instead of going to Kansas for Thanksgiving, we’re going for Christmas! We’ll be going to Green Bay for Thanksgiving, which means we can leave much later and allow more time to ensure everyone is healthy and that we’re actually prepared for the trip. The holiday flip-flop throws a wrench in a few plans, but they can change. We’ll still get to see family, everyone will get to meet Milo and hopefully we can avoid a 12 hour car trip with a puking child (sadly, we’ve done that already).
  • The rearranged plans mean we’ll be in the same state as good friends who normally live across the country.
  • Tonight’s How I Met Your Mother saw the return of the Slap Bet, perhaps the show’s best long-running gag. Not only did we get to see Slapsgiving, but we saw Slap Bet the Game and a reconfigured Slap Song. I laughed so hard I went into a coughing fit.

Guess it wasn’t so bad, huh?

3 thoughts on “Today Has Conspired Against Me”

  1. I went to the emergency room and was told I needed surgery. Then I got stranded in my car with the dog a mile and a half into my 16-hour drive. The car needed to be towed. All in 12 hours. I think I win, but yours certainly lasted longer.

  2. I saw a comment that you made about for stock photos, but I can’t find it on web. Has the name changed or am I missing something? I really need some stock photos for our mission church, and I can’t find what I’m looking for.

    Thanks for your help!

    Jeanette Norman

  3. Jeanette: I don’t remember talking about nor am I familiar with them. The site appears to be down though, so I can’t help you. You could consider asking the folks at the Church Marketing Lab for good stock photography sources.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *