A business writer and interview guru has written a rejection letter for rejection letters. It’s geared for today’s high unemployment job market, but imagine a tweaked version for writers.

Thank you for your letter rejecting my submission to your magazine.

I have received rejections from an unusually large number of prestigious publications. With such a varied and promising spectrum of rejections from which to select, it is impossible for me to consider them all. After careful deliberation, then, and because a number of magazines have found me more unsuitable, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your rejection.

Despite your publication’s history of quality and vast experience in rejecting writers, I find that your rejection does not meet with my requirements at this time. As a result, I expect to see my article published in the next issue of your magazine.

Circumstances change and one can never know when new demands for rejection arise. Accordingly, I will keep your letter on file in case my requirements for rejection change.

Please do not regard this letter as a criticism of your qualifications in attempting to refuse my work. I wish you the best of luck in rejecting future writers.

(props to John Kador)