She’ll always be my daughter.

May 12th, 2011

I have three children.
Two live in my house.
One no longer does.
She came into my life last June and lived here until March.
Sometime around the holidays we began to notice a change. Not bad things, just changes.
Changes that showed us some parts of her past that were a surprise to everyone.
And changes that showed us she was not were she was supposed to be.
In April we made the decision to allow her to move to a new home, another family.
A place that, we hope, can provide what she needs and can devote all of their time and energy into helping her heal.
I wanted so badly to be that person. To be the one to help her heal.
But it was clear that living here was not what she needed from us right now.
What she needed from us was a chance to move on.

She doesn’t live with us anymore.
We’re legally not her parents.
But she will always be my daughter.

16 Responses to “She’ll always be my daughter.”

  1. Meghan on May 12, 2011 7:36 pm

    Always is what you need and it’s what she needs. Love you.

  2. Sarah on May 12, 2011 7:59 pm

    Beautiful post, Abby. All the best to the 5 of you.

  3. bonnie on May 12, 2011 8:31 pm

    Oh Abby – I have no words for you only thoughts of peace and comfort. She will always be a part of your family. How very a hard a road you are walking.

  4. abby on May 12, 2011 8:50 pm

    Thank you friends.

  5. Keri on May 12, 2011 9:03 pm

    We have been praying – and we’ll keep doing so. Although we don’t know the circumstances, we do have a special understanding of what trauma brings. We will continue to pray for healing – God can do anything.

  6. Mama Papaya on May 12, 2011 11:05 pm

    Wishing you peace. You are in my thoughts.

  7. Cindy on May 13, 2011 1:56 am

    Oh Abby I am so sorry. I am happy that she is in a good place and I am sending (((hugs))) from across the ocean.

  8. Jayme on May 13, 2011 2:40 pm

    Thinking of you and wishing you all healing and peace.

  9. Tanya on May 13, 2011 2:42 pm

    Abby, oh my goodness. I am so very sorry. I don’t even know how to respond but to say I sorry for the heartbreak this must cause– even though it is obviously best. Oh my. Giant hugs to you.

  10. Mindy on May 13, 2011 5:52 pm

    biggest hugs that are possible to give to you and your family.

  11. Shannon on May 18, 2011 9:21 pm

    Oh Abby I had no idea. I’m so sorry. So heartbreakingly sorry.

  12. Stefani on May 23, 2011 7:51 pm

    Abby, I am so sorry. I just sent you a pm (which you can feel free to ignore) and then came over to your blog and saw this. Sending all of you peace and healing.

  13. Christina on May 25, 2011 5:25 am

    I am so sorry, Abby, for all of you. What a difficult decision to have to make. Wishing you all peace and healing as you all move forward.

  14. Themia on May 25, 2011 10:38 am

    Peace to you and your family Abby, and especially to that beautiful daughter of yours…may she find the healing she needs. You are brave souls to have taken this road, all of it. Hugs.

  15. Amanda on July 13, 2011 9:42 pm

    I am so sorry. I haven’t checked your blog in a while. If you ever need to talk I’m here for you. You are a brave, kind, honest woman.


  16. shelleey on May 8, 2012 9:22 pm

    i cannot imagine how difficult the last year of not being together has been, and how difficult the decision was to make. praying for your strengthened family, for all brokenness to be healed, and for God’s sovereignty to be evident. respectfully, shelley

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