A quick adoption update


April 5th, 2010

I think we are now at Step 4? of the adoption process. I talked about Step 1 & 2 here.

Step 3 happened on Thursday. We attended an informational meeting regarding the Minnesota Waiting Child Program. After the meeting we felt like it was a good fit for our family. We’re still deciding but we’ve moved on to Step 4, which is signing up and attending the foster parent training at the end of April. Once we’re done with the training we’ll hopefully be more firm in our decision.

For those that are unfamiliar, the MN Waiting Child Program is children who are waiting to be adopted. Usually a sibling group or older (about 8 and up). The process is typically a faster one than international adoption. We were told a “quick” adoption from start to finish is about a year. That’s from the point we sign on until the adoption is finalized. In contrast our adoption with Milo took 26 months from the time we signed on until the adoption was finalized.

After the training, I’ll be able to give you more thrilling details of this whole process.


7 Responses to “A quick adoption update”

  1. Wendi on April 5, 2010 11:14 pm

    How exciting!!!!

  2. Leah on April 9, 2010 9:04 am

    MN considers one year “fast”? Bulgaria is 8 months to a year, Ukraine 6-8 months, Serbia 6-8 months. It just depends where you’re looking. There are so many social orphans all over the world, including the U.S. Somewhere there is a child for everyone, and yes, you need to look where you feel you should be looking.

    As I type this, I’m sitting in a hotel room in Sofia, Bulgaria. This morning and the 5 days prior I was in Belgrade, Serbia, where I toured every inch of orphanages, getting updated pictures and information on kids (both with and without special needs.) I found a set of twins who are developmentally normal, but they will never be adopted in Serbia. Why? Because they are gypsy children, and in Serbia, the gypsies are a lesser class. (and their dark hair and eyes make them stand out in the crowd of fair-skinned Serbs! There was THE most beautiful baby every. He’s 6 months old, with the biggest, darkest eyes you will ever see. He’s also a gypsy, and a very normal baby. He won’t be adopted either…again, because he’s a gypsy. And within a year, this baby who is perfectly normal will no longer be due to lack of physical attention, stimulation, and love.

    I also got to make a 2 1/2 hour drive to another city and meet two little boys with Down syndrome who were living in foster homes. Neither of them have EVER set foot in an orphanage, which is an unheard of blessing. But one boy is now 10 (though physically the size of a 4 year old!) and his foster parents are done with him. They want babies, not older children. He is very high functioning, funny, handsome, and so capable! But, if he’s not adopted soon, he’ll wind up in the mental institution where record of his existence will simply disappear. He will loose all his skills and very quickly be just like all the others who were without love in their early years.

    The other little boy, also with DS and living in a foster home, is 3 years old and developmentally on target in ALL areas! (also unheard of for this region!) His birth mother visits him weekly and is excited for him to be adopted because there is nothing for him here. NOTHING! His paperwork is ready to go and he is ready for a family. If only we can find him a family.

    The last little boy we met is 9 years old, also living in a foster home. His only diagnosis is “ADHD syndrome”. We found him to be a very typical 9 year old boy, embarrassed that people were talking so openly about him while he sat right there. His foster mother is done too. She wants babies, because they pay more for foster parents to care for them.

    But that is just one corner of the world, and our world has many such corners! They are in the U.S. (though thankfully, even for foster children in the U.S., their care will never compare to those in Easter Europe!) and in every other place in the world. So, to those who may be reading, look where you feel you’re being led to look, but don’t let the amount of time make your decision for you, let the child who’s calling to you make the decision for you.

  3. abby on April 9, 2010 3:30 pm

    A year is fast. 8-12 mo. or 6-8 mo. in international adoption is also a fast time frame.

    With the MN program, it’s not a year until you meet your children, it’s about a year until the adoption is finalized. The children are often in the home months before the adoption.

    But, as with our previous adoption, wait times are not the motivating factor.

    I only mentioned it here because a common question I get when announcing an adoption is “how long will you have to wait?”

    Hopefully, the children you see while in Bulgaria and Serbia will be able to find homes soon.

  4. Angel on August 13, 2010 5:37 pm

    I am looking to adopt a gypsy baby from Serbia. Your blog opened an interesting door into my family history because I am a descent of gypsy Serbs that left Yugoslavia almost 100 years ago.

    Do you have any information on who to contact to enquire about the process?

  5. Ashlee on March 4, 2011 3:21 pm

    We too are looking into adopting from Serbia. There is very little information out there on this subject. Does anyone have any additional information on this program. May number one concern is to try to find a 12-24 month old “as healthy as possible!”

  6. abby on March 4, 2011 3:59 pm

    I will be bluntly honest – when I hear people say “12-24 months and as healthy as possible”, it sounds like you are in this for very wrong reasons. Adoption is not to provide you with the perfect baby. Adoption exists because there are children that, for whatever reason, need a family. It comes out of grief, loss and pain.

    Adoption was not created to provide families with children. It was created to provide children with families.

    As for adopting through Serbia – I am not familiar with the process but start with Reece’s Rainbow. They work mostly in Eastern Europe and can probably help you.

  7. Amanda on April 2, 2011 3:56 pm

    Abby,
    Wow, just wow. Your response on March 4th nailed it. Thanks for being blunt!

    Amanda

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