finally.

NaBloPoMo Post #12: A lot to think about

Today we found out that our adoption agency is temporarily closing to people who are requesting a child 0-24 months from Ethiopia. Currently there are over 400 people waiting for a baby which is pushing wait times out to at least 24 months. (Our estimated wait time in Dec 2007 was 6-9 months and extended to 12 months in October of 2008. We waited 11 months and 11 days for our referral.)

They are closing the program simply because there is not a need for parents in this age range. Once upon a time when the Ethiopia program was new (about 5 years ago) it was considered a long wait if you waited a week. Most people heard back within a day or two after submitting their dossier. But the program took off. It got big very, very fast and homes were quickly found for infants and toddlers.

There are people who will say that the program is closing because the “demand” can’t be met. And there are accusations about unethical practices happening. Personally, I don’t beleive that is what is happening with our agency. Has it happened elsewhere? Yes. It’s a tragic side to both international and domestic adoption that corruption and “blackmarket” practices exist. Do your research when looking for an agency. Be careful and cautious. At the same time know that there are plenty of agencies who are working to provide homes for children who need them. But the “whys” are not what this post is about.

This is about what we now need to think about. We really liked our agency. We had a good experience with them. We know that while Milo was in their care they truly loved him and took excellent care of him. The information we have about his background is priceless and the opprotunity to meet people who were a part of his life before us was amazing. And, all of that we have on DVD for him to watch when he is ready. We don’t want to switch agencies because we don’t want our next child to not have the same amount of information. I would have a hard time explaining to a child that Milo has a lifebook with pictures of his village in Ethiopia but he or she doesn’t because we switched agencies because we wanted a baby.

So that leaves us with some decisions to make.

Do we switch agencies? I doubt it.

Do we wait and see if the infant program opens back up? Well, that would put a lot of years between Milo and the next child.

Do we adopt an older child or sibbling group? I’d like to. I’d love to actually. But Milo is only one. We want the next child to be younger than him. So that would mean waiting until Milo was 3 or 4 before starting the process again.

Do we adopt a child from the Waiting Child List? That’s a possibility.

Lots of things to think about. But, one thing is for sure, it makes me grateful that we to the leap and applied to adopt when we did. I can’t really imagine our family without Milo.

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