Rapture Notification System
June 5th, 2008 Posted in Behold, the Internet, God, Church & StuffI saw this mentioned earlier this week but didn’t pay any attention to it until I saw the url: http://www.youvebeenleftbehind.com.
For $40 per year you can join a rapture notification system that will notify your heathen friends and family that Jesus has returned and taken you back to heaven with him and those punk sinners have a second chance:
We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the “Rapture” of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.
Wow. I know Christians are wacky, but come on. All that’s missing is the Timothy LaHaye endorsement, maybe a free copy of Left Behind when you sign up.
My favorite part is that the whole thing is triggered when their team members fail to log in. I can just see the rapture false alarms that will cause untold panic (and laughter). Or perhaps “This is a test of the emergency rapture system…”
(link via wide_awake)
2 Responses to “Rapture Notification System”
By Josh on Jun 5, 2008
Yeah, because when millions of Christians suddenly disappear into thin air, no one will notice or figure out why, because no one in secular culture knows about the Rapture. It’s a big secret. They’ll only figure out what happened when they get a document in their email.
Seriously, if the rapture happened (which it won’t), and if our friends and loved ones couldn’t figure out why we disappeared simultaneously with the millions of other Christians, we must have kept our Christianity a very closely held secret.
By abby on Jun 5, 2008
Wow, they are putting a lot of stock in the faith of 3-5 people. 3-5 people who are currently working for a very nice scam…
Also - in case of rapture - check e-mail? I’m kinda thinking that when a rapture happens it will be more of a panic, flee, riot type mentality - not so much with the e-mail checking.