The Great Mahakali Write-a-thalon (think triathalon) is next weekend (link via Kottke). It’s a contest where writers have 58 hours (basically a weekend) to write a novel. The prizes are pretty vague, but it amounts to exposure and the satisfaction of writing a novel.

For some reason I’m intrigued. I’ve always wanted to write a book (and if you read these thoughts with any regularity you’re probably sick of me saying that) and writing a novel would be even better. I know the day I publish a nonfiction book (which seems easier and more commercially viable) I’ll revise my goal and say I’ve always wanted to write a novel. Not that I have any practice at it. I just want to do it.

Of course the usual factors always tear me down. I don’t have the time to sit down and write a novel. I haven’t come up with an idea I think is novel worthy. More than anything, I’m afraid.

I’m afraid of spending hours on something that doesn’t go anywhere. I know enough about writing to know you can work and work and work and sometimes all you’ve got is crap. I’m also afraid of committing to an idea. I never know if it’s good enough, if it’s strong enough, if it’s an idea that can carry any weight. I’m afriad I’ll write a phone book’s worth of pages before I can even know if the idea is any good. So rather than fail, I don’t even try.

But I know the lesson can’t be never try. One of these days I’m going to have to take a so-so idea and force it into a novel. Even if it’s the crappiest novel ever, I could say I’ve written one. I think I’ve even said that before in a similar ‘ooh I wanna be a writer’ entry. Yep. Anne Lamott recommends writing shitty first drafts, and maybe that’s what I should do. I kind of like the idea of forcing a novel out and then having to bury it in the backyard like radioactive Hemmingway.

So with all those thoughts you can understand why the idea of a 58 hour write-a-thon sounds appealing. Take a single weekend and give it a shot. Why not? It’s only one weekend. With enough caffiene and Radiohead I could probably crank out something worthwhile. Maybe it will only half-suck. But at least I could give it a shot, right?

Of course all the responsibility has a say. I was thinking of borrowing a friend’s truck and hacking back my rabid lilac bushes next Saturday. My lawn-addicted neighbors are getting to me. Abby’s also having a sleep-over with the girls from our youth group, which means I’m out of the house Friday night. The contest also officially begins Friday morning (9:00 a.m. Friday to 7:00 p.m. Sunday), which means I’d have to sacrifice a day of work.

So many excuses. I could always shorten the contest or change the hours and do it my own way. I could always raise support to make up for a day of no work (as if that’s effective). I could always auction the resulting novel to the highest bidder. It’d be like a crapshoot — is it radioactive Hemmingway or just so-so?

Of course if I am going to give it a shot I’d better decide on an idea so my brain can be percolating. The contest forbids pre-writing, but they can’t stop you from thinking about your novel ahead of time. I have a few ideas in the drawer I could fall back on, or I could develop some brand new half-baked idea. So many possibilties.

It’d be even better to post the novel here. Maybe even as I write it. I could start a different contest, a read-a-thon! You have 58 hours to read a novel written only hours before. Of course that would kill any chance to edit my suckiness. Or I could just post the novel in chunks after it’s all said and done.

I’ll have to think about this one.

One more thought: how come I never come up with normal schemes? Like getting a job or buying a car. It’s always something crazy like writing a novel in 58 hours or running an online fundraising drive to buy a computer. Sigh.