A day in the life of the unemployed:

7:00 a.m. – Alarm goes off
7:08 a.m. – Snooze goes off
7:16 a.m. – Snooze goes off, wife gets up for work.
7:20 a.m. – I get out of bed, take the dog outside
7:22 a.m. – Kiss wife as she leaves for work, gather household trash
7:25 a.m. – Scour yard for dog poop, take trash to the curb
7:35 a.m. – Feed dog, have a “mini-breakfast” consisting of a few gulps of OJ and a few spoonfuls of granola
7:40 a.m. – Depart on bike ride
8:05 a.m. – Return home, guzzle water, take shower (including a shave)
8:30 a.m. – Let the dog out, sort and start the laundry
8:45 a.m. – Turn on the computer, prepare real breakfast, let the dog in
9:00 a.m. – Eat breakfast while checking e-mail, morning news
9:20 a.m. – Switch laundry loads, let the dog out
9:30 a.m. – Search online job sites
10:15 a.m. – Change laundry, let the dog in, fold laundry
10:45 a.m. – Add names/contact info to networking database
11:30 a.m. – Write and send two networking e-mails
11:50 a.m. – Draft this silly log of my time
12:00 p.m. – Realize I haven’t brushed my teeth
12:01 p.m. – Brush my teeth
12:03 p.m. – Call wife
12:05 p.m. – Call window people who have been slacking about setting up a measurement appointment
12:09 p.m. – Break to check laundry and eat lunch
12:15 p.m. – Convince dog rain will not impede his ability to urinate
12:20 p.m. – Fold laundry while dog tests that theory
12:30 p.m. – Let dog in, notice that theory was proven correct; begin making lunch
12:35 p.m. – Eat lunch while reading Time magazine article about the Reagan Letters
1:00 p.m. – Check the mail, items of interest: unemployment check and job application rejection (this is rare, of the jobs I’ve applied to, I hear a negative response from only 20%. The rest don’t bother).
1:05 p.m. – Fired off seven more networking e-mails
2:05 p.m. – Change laundry, fold laundry
2:15 p.m. – Read some Johnny Cash, let the dog out
2:45 p.m. – Enter receipts, checks into Quicken, compare with bank statements
3:55 p.m. – Let the dog out, change and fold the laundry
4:05 p.m. – Check latest bank statement against Quicken
4:10 p.m. – Give up. Wife is home. At this point it’s time to start thinking about supper, cleaning up the kitchen, etc.