When it comes to sex I thought our society was about as messed up as it could get. But I found out today that it’s really much worse. There’s been a few excellent examples in the past few weeks. First of all, there’s everyone’s favorite February magazine, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue. This year’s cover model isn’t really wearing a top–she relies on a really big necklace. The cover caption says, “Daniela takes the plunge in Malaysia,” and I can’t help but wonder if she’d really want to swim in that suit. I also can’t help but wonder if the picture was really shot on location–she really looks pasted in. The best part of this year’s Swimsuit issue is 3D. The magazine comes complete with 3D glasses and several of the models are in 3D glory. But the Swimsuit issue is nothing new. Just when you thought Fox couldn’t go any lower, they did a few weeks ago with a live Millionaire Marriage show. A millionaire got to pick a bride from 50 strangers and then married her live on TV. A week later the marriage was annulled. Why not make a mockery of the institution of marriage?

But those two examples pale in comparison to what I heard about today. Now don’t ask me why I read the article. It’s kind of like seeing the tabloids in the line at the grocery store and reading the headlines. I was eating breakfast and reading articles. I stumbled across this one and couldn’t believe it. It’s about a company that makes $5,000 sex toys. It’s basically a full size silicon mannequin. And some guys out there shell out five grand to have sex with an inanimate hunk of plastic. The sad part is the company has sold 500 of them, and is currently 4 months behind. I just can’t quite understand that. If you can’t sustain a relationship or if your significant other just isn’t doing it for you, you can pull the ol’ mannequin out of the closet. All I can do is shake my head. The best part of the article is when the writer was touring the plant where the mannequins are made. The owner’s sister was giving him the tour, and in the middle of the tour her daughter came in and asked about lunch. Here in the middle of this factory for sex toys, where half naked, half assembled mannequins are hanging from wires–a child wanders into the midst of all this. The woman explained that the child thinks they’re giant Barbie dolls. Giant Barbie dolls. That’s a great way to explain it to the kids. Just when I thought society couldn’t get any lower. Sigh.